Friday, June 25, 2010

GRADUATION & THAILAND

We've graduated finally (last Saturday) and my team will leave on our teaching outreach to Thailand on Tuesday!

Thank you, everyone for your support and love... and PATIENCE these past nine months of me studying my brains out and not being the best communicator. I hope to improve now that I am somewhat less busy!

We are preparing teaching for pastors (each of us is choosing a book and teaching it), bible stories for children, and seminars on how to study the bible inductively for different churches in Chiang Rai and Mae Sot, using the books of Philemon and Titus. I'm very much excited!!!

Love you all and please keep in touch! I'm not sure I will have internet access everywhere in Thailand, but I'll do my best to update weekly with photos and news! For now, here are some photos from our last few weeks in the C-SBS!

Jillian
David from Germany, Priscille from Switzerland, and myself... We laughed that this photo captured our nationalities so well. (This is at my birthday dinner)

Myself, Synnove from Norway, and Emily from Indiana singing for a benefit concert

Emily (my roommate), Cliff (our school leader), and myself at Graduation

Cliff gave us all awards... mine was "Best Hollywood Scuba Dive"... yes, I dressed up in my scuba gear (fins and all) for Halloween and hit Hollywood... it was awesome!

Myself, Lez from Nashville, and JK from Los Angeles (Bonfire @ Huntington Beach)

Myself, Jeff, Dan, and JK in Hollywood

Martin from Nigeria and myself... Graduation Night Worship


Friday, June 11, 2010

2 Peter Application Essay - The Prosperity Gospel

I must first preface this essay with saying I wrote this very quickly... I only have a week left, and I'm getting tired!!! There is much more to be said on the subject but I hope this is a sufficient "taste" for now.

2 Peter Application Essay

False teachings are rampant throughout the world today, just as they were at the time of Peter writing this letter. However, what is even worse is that these false teachings creep into the church and masquerade as being Christian doctrines from the Bible. The false teaching that I am going to focus on in this essay is most commonly known as “the prosperity gospel.” Though those who preach it or adhere to it do not label it, one can see the influence of such teaching throughout many church denominations, but especially Pentecostal or Charismatic churches. As a part of YWAM, an interdenominational and international Christian missions organization, I have had the honor, privilege, and challenge of working with people who have different views than me on many areas of Christianity, yet all share common beliefs in the foundational truths of the Gospel. And with traveling to many different countries with equally varying cultures and working with various denominations in those countries, I have seen the influence of this teaching at times. My heart’s intention in addressing this false teaching is not to call out or label any particular person, denomination, or ministry, but rather expose the wrong thinking of this teaching itself as I compare it to what I view as the standard for truth, the Bible in context.

So what is the prosperity gospel? It is also known as Prosperity Theology, the Word of Faith, Wealth and Health, or Name it and Claim it, and by my own summary definition, it is any teaching that says if believers have “enough” faith, they will have physical safety and health and material or financial success. Though as we see Prosperity Theology today is a fairly recent teaching of American Protestant Origin, ideas that we can somehow manipulate God to give us what we want (namely, material wealth and physical health) have been around since the fall of man and were present in pagan worship mindsets since the ancient world until today. I have seen the prosperity gospel preached on a certain American TV station that is broadcast in the Pacific, teaching Fijians surrounding a TV in the sugar town of Lautoka that if they just “sow a seed” and have faith, God will release their healing, God will bless them financially, and they will have happiness. Likewise, I have heard an islander pastor in a particular village preach this same concept to his congregation, with the testimony of how he received a brand new truck from his church denomination’s leaders in the USA because he had faith, while the church members listening to his sermon walked to church that morning, as the buses don’t run on Sundays. Perhaps they just don’t have enough faith, for if they did, by their pastor’s logic, they would also have cars.

This teaching that God will bless us physically or materially if we have enough faith is not only contradictory to the teaching of Scripture, but the danger is it appears to be Biblical, because it stems from the truth that God is the God of Life and Jesus did come to give us abundant life. But did he have BMWs and perfect physical health in mind when speaking of that abundant life? I don’t think so… he wouldn’t have promised suffering if he did. God doesn’t promise material wealth or physical health 100% of the time. If you read the whole Bible, you will see stories where God healed (Naaman the Syrian in the Old Testament, Blind, Lepers, and a Hemorrhaging woman in the New Testament) and stories where his people suffered and even died (Job, John the Baptist, the Apostles throughout Acts.) You will see stories where God provided finances miraculously (oil and flour that didn’t run out until a famine was over, a coin in a fish’s mouth), and times where Jesus honored those who gave everything with no promise of recompense (the woman with the alabaster box of perfume, the woman who gave two small coins which were all she had.) …So what are people to do when they pray with all the faith they have, they fast, they tithe, they give out of their need, just as those who teach the prosperity gospel told them, and then God doesn’t give them what they were seeking him for? If they believe that it was based on their faith, they will walk in self-condemnation and guilt for not having enough faith. Or worse, they will turn away from God because everything they knew about him turned out to be false. I spoke with a friend last year that used to consider himself a Christian but would rather call himself Agnostic now. He had been very involved in a church that preached that if you have enough faith, God will heal you physically, or those for whom you pray. He prayed for his mother who was fighting cancer and was very sick. He fasted, he tithed, he anointed her with oil and had the elders of his church lay hands on her and pray for her. But she still died. Because of this false teaching of the prosperity gospel, he completely missed God’s heart and is still in a lot of pain from a church that didn’t know how to associate with him, a failed believer in their eyes. On the other hand, much more recently I have watched my cousin and her husband go through the death of their nine-year-old son to Leukemia. Still heartbroken and grieving, their faith is as strong as ever (even if they don’t feel like it right now.) What is the difference? This family knew from the start that God’s promises for life were eternal promises, not just for the here and now. They held on to those promises even for the last three years of battling this horrid cancer and watching their beloved son die. Is God still the life-giver? Yes! Is he still the source of hope? Yes!

I wish I had more time and more pages to use to write of all the stories from the Old Testament where people tried to manipulate God with their worship, but he said he didn’t want their worship if it was empty… many of the prophets spoke against this mindset that God existed for the sake of people’s comfort and happiness. And I wish I could tell you everywhere in the New Testament where Jesus and his Apostles did not promise an easy life, but promised that God would be with them in whatever they went through. I think I would end up using the entire Bible, because it ALL speaks against the prosperity gospel, if you read it in context of course. But that is the problem of the prosperity doctrine… it doesn’t take into consideration the context of these scriptures, but uses them to fit into it’s teaching.

At the end of the matter, I just want to say, I don’t believe people who teach prosperity theology are all intentionally false teachers, and I don’t lump them all together. There are those who promise financial success if you will just give to their ministry which obviously raise red flags of heresy, but then there are those who just want people to live their lives fully for God, and they truly believe that means being healthy and wealthy. My stomach churns as I listen to those of the first group, but my heart hurts for those of the second… both are missing out on God himself, and the fact that the greatest wealth we could possibly have is having a relationship with God. If they could only see this, they would see that true prosperity already belongs to those who simply love Jesus and believe in him, no matter their income or health, no matter if they drive a Benz or walk several kilometers for water each day, no matter if they never face losing loved ones or have lost their entire family.

Oh God, please help us to grow in our knowledge of Your truth and communicate that truth alone. Help us to examine our lives and our motives in seeking you. Thank you for the abundant life we have simply because we know you and are known by you.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Team Thailand

Here we are! Photo taken today at YWAM LA by Jennifer Kwan.
Guys from Left to Right: Jeremy Park, Dave Skinner, & Michael Ausherman
Girls from Lef to Right: Emily Skinner, Bridgette Skinner, Ange Miracle, Emily Yoder, & Me!

The COUNTDOWN has begun!
24 sleeps until my birthday!
25 sleeps until we leave for THAILAND!!!



Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Thailand!!!

I'm leaving for Thailand on June 29th!!!

I'll be there for one month with a team of 5 students and 2 staff teaching the Bible in Chiang Rai and Mae Sot!

Here is a link for some current news regarding the protests in Bangkok.

I wanted to add some photos of the areas where I will be, but to avoid copyright issues, I have included the links to their owners' flickr pages. This is the bummer of never having been there yet!!!
Here is Chiang Rai and here is Mae Sot.

We will be staying in Bangkok 2 days for cultural orientation, then we will head to Chiang Rai for the majority of our trip, and also will spend several days in Mae Sot.

In Chiang Rai we will be staying at a boarding school, where we will be serving, teaching, and learning I am sure! We will also be traveling to various hill tribes in the north.

In Mae Sot we will be working with Burmese and Karen Refugees near the border of Thailand and Myanmar.

Until then, I've got less than 3 weeks left of School, then I will have studied all 66 books of the Bible!!! We graduate June 19th, then have some prep time to get our teaching stuff together, then we're off to Thailand 10 days later!

Bless you all, thanks for your prayers and please keep in touch!




Friday, May 21, 2010

La la la la life goes on...

Not to say I have forgotten the events of the past few weeks, or that I am not thinking constantly of the Jensens, or my mom and dad... but it's true: life does go on... and whether I want to keep going with it or not is of no importance. Life goes on just the same. And for that, I am grateful. I have life today and I have people to love today, and I have things God put me here on earth to do... today.

SO... What's today hold? Well this week we've been studying Ephesians. I'm quite happy to say I actually completed the homework for this book (the last few weeks I didn't come close to finishing... couldn't focus, I guess.) And, while I did learn a lot about the historical background of Ephesus during the AD 60s and why this letter was so significant to the people then, the thing that I want to write about is this: it reminded me of when I was a sweet and [not-so-] innocent 19-year-old living in Orange County, CA. I realize not everyone knows this story, so I'll share a bit.

I had just moved back from Orlando, Florida where I had worked for Disney World (no comments, please!) and had started attending a church college group in Irvine as an attempt to reach out to God... I knew he had been reaching out to me, but I had put him on the proverbial shelf for a while. I still believed in God, but couldn't understand why he had let some things in my life happen, if he was all-powerful AND all-loving as I had been told. So I did things "my way" for a while. Anyway... the party life of the disney college program didn't seem to offer any lasting happiness, and actually, all I left with was remnants of a bad case of mono and cynicism.

So here I was in 2002, at a bible study group in Newport Beach with all these girls my age and older who seemed to be genuinely secure in who they were... and they were normal girls... we surfed together before work, we all had "normal" jobs... nobody was a crazy fanatic as I judged most Christians to be. (Like I said, I was cynical!) We studied a letter written by the Apostle Paul to the church in Ephesus... Its one of the books in the New Testament, Ephesians... the book we studied this week in class. The letter laid out the identity of God's children and I realized I didn't have security in who I was like the other girls in my group. I wasn't a size zero like my roommate, I drove a 92 two-tone blazer that parked next to her latest BMW 5 series... and I lived in the land of constant comparison - the OC. I even compared myself to these girls who cared for me and loved me through my cynicism and self-loathing. And I still had issues with God... didn't really know if he was good, if I could trust him...

I'd like to say things changed overnight, in one instance. But... it was the constant love and genuine care from those girls and also many other people in my life who had prayed for me for years... I began to see God's goodness in the different events of my life that had shaped my childhood and teen years - even the ones that had hurt me so deeply. I began to see that I really COULD trust God, and that he really loved me. REALLY.

As I began to understand God and his heart, I began to see myself as God saw me... not as the world did, not even as I formerly saw myself. I saw that in Jesus, I was CHOSEN... I was ACCEPTED... I was MADE NEW... I was LOVED... I had PURPOSE... and I was more MYSELF if that makes any sense.

That's the message of Ephesians to me.

You'd all know I was a liar if I said life was easy from that point on. The last few entries are evidence enough of the pain I've still experienced as a believer and follower of Jesus. But, I'm so grateful that God reached out to me, that he loved me through my crap, and that he gave me friends to help me see him more clearly. I'm grateful that he has given me comfort and hope in a way no one else could, through things I never imagined I would experience, but know I would not have survived had it not been for his presence in my life.

Has God used a particular message from the Bible to reach out to you? Has he used people to draw you to him? I would love to hear your stories...

Love you all,

Jillian

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Loss...



What a week...
The three year anniversary of my brother's death...

Flying home for less than 24 hours to attend Luke's memorial...
And more death and more cancer in the families of my friends...

It's been a tough week for a lot of us.


This is going to sound ridiculous: I feel torn between who to feature in my profile picture on Facebook... Lukey or my brother. So I've been sort of switching them out. Stupid, really... Facebook... But I just want to somehow honor them both, and, well, Facebook is the best I can do right now, I guess. Luke's face is still fresh in my memory. My brother's is starting to blur a bit, so I have been looking at photos a lot lately... I never thought it would happen. I was trying to think of how he looked the last time I saw him alive and I can't remember. It's driving me insane. I remember he had stopped by for a sandwich and cup of coffee on his way to work, and I was heading to Hawaii that weekend and wasn't going to see him for a few weeks... I remember standing in our driveway talking while he was sitting in his car... but I can't remember what we talked about, can't picture his face or what he was wearing... maybe its not important.

I was talking with one of my roommates the other day about loss... the pros and cons of knowing one might die vs. sudden death. I can't say I like either. And I can't really compare.

I hated watching Luke suffer, and I wasn't even there for the half of it. But, I loved that his cancer made him want to make the most of his life, and made others want to as well. I loved when he gave me hugs, knowing how precious a commodity they were, and I told him I loved him every time I saw him, even that last time back in March... in a weird and horrid way, it was actually a blessing to know he might die.

With Jeff, I have to be honest, I took those things for granted. I thought he'd be around forever. He had had several car accidents where he totaled the car, yet walked away... I'd come to think he was untouchable. I think he thought he was, too. I don't know if I said "I love you" the last time I saw him. I think I did, but I can't remember. I know he knew I did, but still... I don't know. Its not that I have regrets... well, maybe I do, but I regret having them. Schmeh.

A friend of mine commented as he drove me to the airport (to fly home for Luke's service) that he hadn't lost any close family members or friends. I think he said this to say, "I'm sorry I can't comprehend what you are going through, so I'm not going to lie and say I can." I appreciate honesty, and I seriously dislike when people try to say they do know what I am going through, or they try to give me some sort of spiritual pat-answer.

But as this friend pointed out his lack of comprehension of grief, I realized... we are a different breed. Those of us who have had close loved ones die. Its like a club nobody wants to be a member of, but the members are grateful there are other members in the club. I know when I became a member, I was glad there were already others in the club who I could talk to and process my crazy emotions and thoughts with.

However, ultimately, even those in the club can't relate to everything... each loved one is different, each relationship was different. I've spoken to friends who lost brothers much longer ago than I, and one who lost two brothers more recently... but it's different. Their relationships were different. My brother and I had our unique parents, and we ourselves are unique... Nobody can quite understand the loss I feel. And as much as I hate the cliche-ness of the following statement when used by someone with no understanding of its truth, I've come to realize that it is, in fact, truth, and I've come to experience the comfort of it: Only Jesus knows exactly what I am going through. He knows. He is my source of comfort, my source of hope. He knows.

I guess this was a lot of rambling... but I just felt like expressing some of the thoughts running through my brain that are keeping me from doing anything productive in my homework.

I posted some photos of my brother and I and also Luke and I.

That way, I don't have to feel bad which one I choose for Facebook.

Friday, May 7, 2010

We love you Luke!

Lukey stepped in to heaven yesterday morning.

I wish I had some profound words to say to his momma, my dear friend Vikki, or to Jake and Tori, his brother and sister who now share something in common with me - the loss of a brother... but I know words don't take the pain away.

Selfishly, I wish I could play Jenga with all of them one more time, or nerf wars, or go swimming with them and the cousins again.

And while I know God is good and Luke is with him in heaven, without pain and completely cancer-free, and while I know God will eventually bring the Jensens and their extended family through the time of grief... for now... its just heartbreaking.

I feel detached from it all, living down in LA... but I'm so glad I spent some quality time with them all back in March... I don't really know what to say to my friends here. Luke became quite famous, and friends of mine from around the world have been praying for him and his family. I know they will continue to pray for the family, but I just wish I could say something.

So, no news about my school this week... just a tribute to my buddy, Luke. He will be missed by so many, myself included. I will even miss how he'd call my bum jiggly... Well, sort of. Mostly I'll miss his sweet smile and amazing attitude through stuff most adults would balk at.

Maybe he'll pick on my brother in heaven for me until I get there. I imagine they'd get along. Both are a little stubborn and ornery... both have amazing senses of humor... both loved Legos here on this earth... yeah... I don't know what heaven is like, but if it is anything like I imagine, I think they'd be friends.

Vikki, Steve, Jake, Tori... I'm praying for you all and crying with you over the hole in our lives where Luke used to be. I pray that God comforts you in a way only he can in this time, where human words and actions fail, I pray he would know just the right touch, words, and even memories to bring to your mind. I think he can do that... He's God, after all.

Love you guys sooooo much.

Jillian